My friend Ann Albers shared this youtube video on validation. I loved it and wanted to pass it along! Click on the link below to view:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cbk980jV7Ao

I continue to be baffled by the lack of knowledge most of us have when it comes to processing our emotions. It's not surprising really. We're not taught anything about our emotions in school, and we learn how to deal with our emotions at home by observing other family members.

A lucky few come from healthy families where emotional maturity is modeled, but the rest of us have to learn from whatever sources are available, and a lot of what is taught about emotions is incomplete at best, and sometimes even downright wrong.

Take for example, the simple idea of talking to a friend when you're highly emotional. This is considered a healthy thing to do, but in reality it is not always the most productive. If you think about it, intense emotions are like a tornado of swirling debris that needs to run its course before any items fall to the ground that can be salvaged. If we talk to a friend during the tornado, many times more energy is added to the emotional storm along with throwing in a few of their own items (advice), resulting in increased intensity and confusion.

I do believe that emotional support is essential for every human being - we are relational beings who need each other to grow and thrive. At the same time, we also need to be able to contain our own emotional storms long enough for them to settle so that we can regain visibility.

Here's the nugget in this idea: emotional energy needs to be contained long enough to distill into something valuable. Once the dust settles, the main points will be left in plain view to be dealt with productively.

According to Chinese philosophy, yin and yang are always working together to create perfect balance. Yin is about receiving. It is the dark side of the yin yang symbol - the side responsible for regeneration and renewal. Yang is the bright side, and is is responsible for giving and action.

Our society values yang. We want to be productive and always moving (myself included). We call ourselves "lazy" when doing nothing. The problem with this emphasis on Yang, is that we are now out of balance. We are so under-nourished and starving for renewal that we are running even faster and doing even more in an attempt to feel satisfied.

A lot of my work has been on the subject of mindless consumption - the tendency to over-spend, over-drink, over-eat, over-work, over-socialize etc. This is a problem that has now led to the collapse of our economy. It is causing more and more of our children to become obese, and is leading to ever increasing levels of addiction in teens and adults.

The only way to transform this imbalance is for more of us to cultivate the ability to receive. We do this by taking time each day to receive our own spirit. As we become energized from within, giving and doing take on new purpose. Instead of chasing ourselves, we extend ourselves. Instead of over-consuming, we express our essence. Instead of being a bottomless pit that can never get enough, we show up for our lives full and share our light with the world.

Anna and I have a tradition of going to the Desert Botanical Gardens. Most years we go during the day and take in the beautiful landscape and visit the butterfly pavilion (If you haven't ever visited a butterfly pavilion, put it on your list!)

This year we went at night to see the glass exhibit. We are standing in front of one of the sculptures in this picture. They were all breathtaking. Many of them mirrored shapes naturally found in the desert.

I appreciate these moments of inspiration so much. They don't need to be as spectacular as this exhibit to float my boat. Spring time is a source of inspiration in and of itself. The warmth, the sound of the doves, and the increased sunlight at the end of the day. Being inspired (in spirit) is what life's all about.

What's inspiring you?

"An individual can become addicted, dependent, or compulsively obsessed with any activity, substance, object, or behavior that gives him/her pleasure." - W.R. Miller

Anything from ongoing relationship conflicts to emotional eating and binge drinking can take on a life of its own and lock us in its tight grip. Nothing steals our inner peace more than addictive patterns, which literally drain the life out of us.

To this end, I'm starting a group called Transforming Addictive Patterns: A Holistic Approach to Recovery and Beyond. The group will focus on the common elements of healing rather than the addictive patterns themselves - as what we focus on expands, so why not focus on health and inner peace!

It will be held at my office in Scottsdale on Monday nights from 6:00-8:00. Please call 480-443-0840 or email contact@kimberlykingsley.com for more information.

Have you heard of the Kindle? It's an electronic reading device developed and sold by Amazon. It is quickly catching on with avid readers. Last week I saw Jeff Bezos (Amazon Founder and CEO) in an interview speaking about the Kindle phenomenon.

The Kindle is a wireless, hand held reading device about the size of a book. The screen looks like book pages - antique white paper with black letters. You can download a book in 60 seconds from your couch or favorite reading chair.

I know this sounds like a commercial about Kindle, but I have not taken a marketing position with Amazon;) I am however, interested in how the magical device will change the evolution of book distribution. The books are a lot cheaper - The Energy Cure is 7.99 on Kindle versus 12.99 retail - and it's an environmentally friendly alternative to traditional printing.

So far there are 240,000 books available for the Kindle and more are being added each day. Bezos said his goal is to have every book ever written available for Kindle readers to access at any time. Cool huh!